Friday, September 15, 2017

New This Week in Fiction

Hillary's new book hasn't hit the $1 bin in the book stores yet, but it's well on its way.


Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Hillary Lawyers Face Bar Sanctions

Today's Breitbart News Headline: Hillary Lawyers Face Bar Sanctions Over Deletion of Clinton Emails

No worries. Hillary's bar tabs are way more bigly than the bar sanctions her lawyers face.

Friday, September 8, 2017

Hillary Ramrod'm

Contributed by Rocky D, www.rockyd.com:
Hillary Ramrod'm has a book out about her election loss titled "What Happened." What happened? YOU happened, Hillary. She blames it all on Bernie Sanders, the DNC and FOX News. Nevermind those other three, eh Hillary; like Benghazi, emails and people who work for a living.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Unhappy Hour

"Hillary only drinks in two situations: When she loses and when she wins." --Scott Adams

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Hillary Builds a Firewall

Hillary Clinton is promoting a new left-wing website named Verrit, just "for the 65.8 million" people who voted to elect her president. 

So how will Hillary keep out all the "undocumented workers" who couldn't vote her?

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Hillary's Crawling Skin

Hillary says Presi-dude Trump "makes my skin crawl." Well that's what happens when you try to wear a human skin suit over your lizard scales.


Tip o'the hat to Rocky D for the contribution!
www.rockyd.com
Red Nation Rising Radio
Scorpion Radio Group

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Counting All The Votes

Researchers say that 20% of American adults are mentally ill or drug addicted. The rest of the people who voted for Hillary Clinton are either illegal aliens or deceased. 

Monday, July 24, 2017

Hillary Returns to Her Roots

Hillary just announced that "old-fashioned capitalism" is going to be her campaign theme for the 2020 presidential election. In other words, theft. 

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Hillary's Place in Line

"Do Democrats know that Hillary Clinton is not second-in-line for the presidency? It's hard to tell." --Scott Adams

Thursday, July 13, 2017

By Way of Comparison...

A huge glacier has broken off of Antarctica's ice sheet and fallen into the ocean. Early reports indicate the iceberg is even larger than Hillary Clinton's pantsuit. 

Sunday, July 2, 2017

A Mile is 5280 Feet

Bill Clinton said that to understand what Hillary has been through, people should try walking a mile in her shoes. 

Really? Hillary can't even walk a mile in her shoes. 

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Mexico Defeats Russia!

Breaking News: (6/24/2017) Mexico has just advanced to the FIFA Confederations Cup 2017 football (soccer) semi-finals after beating Russia 2 to 1. 

It looks like the soccer scoreboard was more secure against Russian hackers than Hillary Clinton's emails were.

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Hillary's Cell Phones

Q. What did Secretary of State Hillary Clinton have in common with her Blackberry cell phones?

A. They all got hammered.

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Sick and Tired

Another day, another Hillary Clinton meme. 

"Hillary is getting sick and tired of being accused of all the things she has done."


Friday, June 9, 2017

Endeavor to Persevere!

On June 4, Hillary Clinton posted this virtue signaling tweet about the London Bridge terrorist attack, "After acts of unspeakable cruelty & cowardice, the people of London & the UK choose resolve over fear." In other words, Hillary called on the victims to "endeavor to persevere!"


Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Wine Comes From Sour Grapes

"Much to the dismay of many Democrats, Hillary Ramrod'm is on her 'Sour Grapes' tour, where she is blaming everyone else for her loss, except for the one person whose fault it was -- she herself. Maybe she's afraid to say that because that would make her sexist. She looks like a crazy cat lady with a hangover. She says she takes full responsibility for her decisions, but that did not cost her the election. That's like a pitcher blaming his loss on the batters. Halfway through her bitter speech, Hillary held up the severed head of her pollster, Nate Silver, from ESPN. Lady, you hired a guy who actually thinks football linemen are talented; whattaya expect. In a related story, Tiger Woods called up Hillary and offered her an intervention."

Tip of the hat to Rocky D 
Red Nation Rising Radio

Saturday, June 3, 2017

It's Worth a Shot

Hillary is in such bad health that she has finally agreed that she needs to start getting some exercise, so she bought some heavier shot glasses.

Friday, June 2, 2017

Don't Blame Bill

Hillary-husband Bill Clinton has often been accused of chasing anything in a skirt. However, pantsuits are an entirely different matter. 


Not Being of Sound Mind and Body

Perpetual loser Hillary Clinton attacked the DNC this week, claiming that she, “[I]nherited nothing from the Democratic Party.” 

That's because her party isn't quite dead yet.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Kathy Griffin is Sorry

Kathy Griffin's apology for her mock assassination and beheading of President Donald Trump is worth less than a pair of running shoes would be to Hillary Clinton.

Monday, May 29, 2017

Blood Will Tell

Trump supporters: Mostly Blood Type "O" Positive. 

Hillary supporters: Mostly Hepatitis Type "B" Positive.

Saturday, May 27, 2017

Deductive Reasoning

Q. How do we know Hillary didn't murder Seth Rich? 

A. His wallet wasn't taken.

Election Night Reference

In a Fox News report this week on Hillary Clinton's bitter Wellesley commencement speech, Tucker Carlson joked, "Surprising she gave the address herself, rather than sending John Podesta to give it for her."

Thursday, May 25, 2017

Political Climate Change

The Washington Post is hysterically demanding that people quit raising questions about Hillary Clinton and the unsolved murder of Seth Rich. According to the fake-news newspaper, the narrative is settled.

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Graft or Grift?

In the wake of her disastrous failure to take over America, Hillary Clinton has returned to her rent seeking roots by creating Onward Together, a non-profit fund-raising front that isn't legally required to disclose donors. If that doesn't work, she intends to start a GoFundMe account. 

Friday, May 12, 2017

Hear No Evil

Elizabeth Warren (Hillary Clinton's Mini-Me) is pushing a bill in Congress, the Over-the-Counter Hearing Aid Act of 2017, to block the sale of over-the-counter hearing aids because too many people might be using them to listen to "fake news." Fauxcahontas is also considering legislation to ban binoculars over concerns with smoke signal reading. 

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Encroaching Senility

Hillary Clinton has denounced the "timing" of President Trump's decision to fire the disgraced former FBI Director James Comey. Hillary demanded to know why Donald didn't fire Comey before the election.

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Champion of what?

Hillary Clinton just appeared at the 100th-anniversary celebration of Planned Parenthood, where she received their Champion of the Century Award. The wife of former President Bill Clinton proclaimed, "We can never let them grind us down." 

The shrieking applause from the assembled abortionists drowned out the rest of her statement, "So we have to kill them and sell their parts first."

Friday, April 28, 2017

Jelly Hillary

Elizabeth Warren says that she's troubled by Barack Obama's $400000 speaking fees. Not Hillary Clinton though. Hillary's just jealous as hell. 

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Hillary Alert

NBC News reports that Hillary Clinton has announced that she is "ready to come out of the woods." 

Civil Defense authorities will sound an all-clear signal once she returns to it.

Sunday, April 23, 2017

Like Father, like Mother

At Variety’s Power of Women event, Saturday Night Live member Vanessa Bayer noted that Chelsea Clinton’s mother, Hillary Clinton, isn't President

But for that matter, neither is Chelsea's father.


Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Hillary's W-2

Q. Why hasn't Hillary Clinton filed her income tax return yet?

A. Her W-2s from Saudi Arabia are still being translated.

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Hillary So Older

Hillary Clinton came out of hiding this week to defend her poorly run campaign for president. At one point a reporter challenged her over her awful decision to put Al Gore, 69, in charge of her her campaign's youth outreach efforts. Hillary defended her choice by pointing out Al Gore is youthful compared to her. 

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Pizzagate

Q. How did Hillary Clinton get rid of Pizzagate?

A. She had Jared eat it. 

Sunday, April 9, 2017

The Saleswoman

Q. Why did Hillary Clinton sell 20% of America's uranium to the Russians?

A. Her commission. 

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Friday, March 31, 2017

Hillary's Explanation

Hillary Clinton was asked by a reporter about her role in rigging the primary election and cheating in her debates with Bernie Sanders. "Shut up," she explained. 

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Like an Old Banana

Hillary Clinton just announced her new campaign slogan for 2020: Resist, Insist, Persist, Enlist.

IOW, RIPE


Sunday, March 19, 2017

Hillary's Haircut

The Gateway Pundit reports that Hillary Clinton just got a $1200 haircut at the Bergdorf Goodman salon. 

That's like $2 or $3 dollars a hair. 

Friday, March 3, 2017

The Russian Winter

Hillary Clinton held an impromptu press release today to announce that she is too damn cold and to warn the Russians to quit fiddling with the thermostat. 

Thursday, March 2, 2017

The Remainder Bin

Target is reportedly going back to selling cheap junk as its go-forward sales strategy, so they're buying up as many copies of Hillary Clinton's new autobiography as they can lay their hands on. 

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Keep on trucking, Hillary!

Does this Hillary make my truck look bigger?


Donald calls Hillary

Ring Ring, Ring Ring

Hillary Clinton: Hello?
President Trump: Knock, knock.
Hillary Clinton: Who's there?
President Trump: Not you.

Monday, February 20, 2017

Treating the Symptoms

Hillary is furious that Donald Trump is bringing free-market reforms to Obamacare. Hillary is demanding that the President provide free Xanax to all of her remaining followers.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Crash Test Dummy

New realistic crash test dummies are being made older and fatter.  From now on they'll all look like Hillary Clinton.

Monday, February 6, 2017

Friday, February 3, 2017

Tit for Tat

The New York Post has been urging Hillary Clinton to run for mayor of Los Angeles. The Los Angeles Times just retaliated by urging Hillary Clinton to run for mayor of New York City.

Friday, January 20, 2017

I'm Leaving on a Jet Plane

Bill and Hillary Clinton met up with Attorney General Loretta Lynch on an airport tarmac again today. They're all sharing a flight to a non-extradition country. 

Monday, January 16, 2017

Hillary's Platinum Card

In honor of her years of living the high life on the taxpayers' dime, Hillary Clinton is slated to recieve a Platinum EBT Card. 

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Who's Your Daddy?

Chelsea Clinton, pulled over for a traffic violation, screamed at the police officer, "How dare you! Do you know who my father is?"

The officer replied, "You should ask your mother."

Monday, January 2, 2017

Glue Factory

Hillary Clinton continues denying news reports of her failing health, and claims that she is just as healthy as a horse. 

Or at least an old donkey.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Not Liking Lyin' Ryan

The New York Post reports that President-elect Donald Trump called Democrat Senator Charles Schumer to say that he likes Schumer more than Republican Congressman Paul Ryan and Republican Senator Mitch McConnell. Trump hastened to add that was an extremely low bar.

Stop the Presses

Hillary Clinton has written a new book, originally entitled How I Won the Presidency, scheduled for release sometime in 2017. 

Just as soon as she comes up with a different title.